My trip back to SJ is in 14 days. I cannot contain hoe much I’m looking forward to it.
My family and friends, and the food. Oh lord do I miss the food of the bay area.

My flight is at 5:40 in the morning, I doubt I’ll get any sleep though. The only thing bad about that is I have no idea where I’ll get my morning coffee, Washington has spoiled my caffeine addiction.
The thing I’m most not looking forward to is my parents judgment because I haven’t lost weight. Or started school. This vacation is supposed to be fun and I know my parents are gonna upset me somehow.

Ugh. I can’t wait to see my friends, I still haven’t been able to make friends up here and it really sucks.

bluespock:

self-care is locking yourself in the holodeck and murdering neelix to release your internalized vulcan rage

(Source: bluespock)

Taco basically straight up told me he doesn’t find me attractive anymore, and hasn’t for a long time now. I feel so hurt. I moved up to goddammit nowhere with the man I love and am told this when I’m thinking about maybe marrying this guy. I know he loves me but I need to figure out what this really means for us.

I wanna go back to San Jose so badly.

Tomorrow is move in day for Taco and I. It’s been a month in the making and I can’t wait. This is starting my life with the person I love. Yeah, we’ve been together for 4 and a half years and living with each other most of that time but we will be just the 2 of us now. No more roommates wanting to bang me, or taking our food, or just being annoying. It will just be Taco and I and I’m a little scared.

I’m still having trouble making friends up here. I don’t know if I’m not putting myself out there enough or maybe too much. I miss my friends so much. I miss having game nights and playing rock band. I miss having people to eat with and talk with. I’m not giving up on Spokane yet, we said we’d give it a year, but gosh am I home sick.